A Hopeful Story

This story, shared by one of my online English students at work, made me happy. :)

So this one lady logged onto the class as usual to practice chatting English, and she was so excited because her husband had given her flowers for their anniversary. Moreover, it was a surprise because he had been unusually busy with work recently and she hadn't expected him to make such an effort. She also speculated fondly of how he must have carried the large bouquet on a crowded train!

We all took turns sharing about thoughtful gifts we had received, and each lady (it's mostly housewives who have time to do eikaiwa during the afternoon) remembered some gift from her spouse. One said she had never received flowers, but that's because her husband knew she liked chocolate more! (Hana yori dango -- sweets over flowers.)

Talking about kind gifts, even if a lot of them were simple, made me happy because recently I read an article on JapanTimes about the increase in loveless marriages and people too busy for relationships. Now, JapanTimes often isn't that reliable. This particular article had a rather patronizing tone of "Oh, you silly Japanese. You should take after Americans to learn what a successful relationship looks like." (Isn't there some saying about taking care of the plank in your own eye before going after the speck in your neighbor's? But I digress...)

The article might have been ridiculous, but I do feel like there are couples in Japan who act more like roommates. In general, Japanese people (especially guys) are less comfortable talking about romantic things. I would like to read an article about how an American person can encourage her Japanese friends in their relationships...That would actually be more helpful than another article complaining about Japan.

That's why I felt encouraged today, hearing ordinary, unromantic housewives who have been married 20 or 30 + years--and are usually more concerned with the mundanities of cooking dinner for busy husbands--reminisce about thoughtful actions their spouses had done for them.

Romance is not dead! Not in America and not in Japan!